f0reverinlove asked: hi Bri. i hope everything's okay with you and your boyfriend. if you ever need someone to talk to i'm here. keep smiling. you're beautiful. <3
thank you so much. that really does mean a lot.
I don’t get a lot of things. I don’t get why you want to go so long with out talking.. people have been telling me all day that I’m beautiful, and this is not all worth it. I don’t believe them. When you told me you missed me and wanted to hold me, I instantly starting balling my eyes out. I want you to so bad. and I was so tempted to drive to your house just to try to get it to happen. I’m scared you aren’t going to want me anymore. I’m actually scared that that’s already happened. I wish you trusted me like I trust you. because none of this would be happening. I’m trying to stay strong, and think positive, and hope for the best. but it’s so so hard to do all of those..
when I woke up this morning. it all just seemed like a dream. I didn’t want to believe it. I wanted to text you, like I always do. but I stopped myself, and l told myself I wanted you to text me. and you did. and it brought my faith up a little more. I miss you. so much. even though technically we’re still together, I just feel like you aren’t mine… I hate that feeling. I hope you reply to my text. I hope you ask me to come see you. I hope you hug me and kiss me like nothing’s wrong. it won’t happen, but it’s okay to hope and wish, right?
its crazy how my whole world can come crashing in 3 minutes. I dont know what I did for this to happen, but everyone is telling me not to blame myself, its not my fault. but I cant help but to blame myself. I feel like there was something I couldve done to prevent all of this. I couldve made you feel better about yourself. because youre perfect, and I dont want you to feel any less than that. im gonna keep telling myself that we are going to get through this, because I cant lose you. and I wont lose you. Its crazy how when the person you fell in love with says they cant do it anymore, the first thing I honestly wanted to do, was kill myself. I know that I wouldnt, and I couldnt, but thats the first thing that popped up into my mind. Youre my bestfriend, and now I have no one to text all day, to hang out with all the time, to just hangout and cuddle and watch movies with. I just want you.. I want us to hang out, whether its like we’re dating, or whether its just us as friends.. as long as I get to be with you. I dont know what to think right now, or say, or anything. it hasnt even been 8 hours, and I miss you so much all ready.
